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August 10, 2004
Farewell, Uncle 002
It may seem callous for me to say that I didn't know his name, but I didn't, and that's perfectly normal. He is the second son of my mother's mother, who has always been referred to by his honorific title by my generation as Uncle #2, though I like Uncle 002 better, stemming from convention started when I referred to Uncle #7 as 007.
Anyway, Uncle 002 passed away in mid-July. I don't know the exact date--maybe 11 or 12 July, depending on how the time zones fell--but I was called Monday night (12 July) by my sister. He had gone to dim sum that day to celebrate his son-in-law's birthday (I think), didn't feel well and went home to take a nap. He died of heart failure, for which he'd had a quadruple bypass years before.
Did I know him? Yes and no. He lived in Hong Kong, so I only ever really saw him when I went back to visit, which was a total of maybe six months worth of time spread over four visits (age 6, 8, 13, 27). He was an affable guy, financially struggling but emotionally rich, with three lovely daughters and six lovelier grandchildren. Spent a whole day with him wandering around Hong Kong on my last trip and saw the condo he had planned to retire to. I liked him, but didn't talk with him that much.
At first, I looked at his death pretty impassively. I figured I didn't know him that well and was more concerned about my mother, who was taking it pretty hard. It wasn't until I started writing this that his loss really began to affect me.
Originally, there was talk about the three siblings in North America not returning for the funeral and it seemed to be resolved as such, but I know my mom. She listened to reason and gave up on going to the funeral. I'm truly glad that she turned after dealing with some travel obligations and went back anyway. Family is important.
I didn't always feel that way, but I'm coming around.
Posted by KinCross at August 10, 2004 04:09 PM